Bittersweet feelings

I want to say that this is my last trip to nostalgia but I wouldn't. It bittersweet to go back and reminisce.

Last Saturday, day one of my lolo's wake, I just couldn't take a look at my lolo. I was still in denial that he has already passed. But when the casket was finally opened for viewing, I felt really sad with what i saw. I still see the same old man I used to see, only this time he was deep in slumber. My little cousin kept calling for his lolo and when he didn't get any response, he went to his mom and asked, "Why isn't Angkong answering? Mommy, why is he sleeping here?"

My aunt responded, "He is resting, now go on outside. Angkong doesn't want to be disturbed." The tyke still kept calling for him...

I remember, my lolo was hard to hear. He always exclaimed, "Haaaah! (in ascending tone)" whenever we talked to him. He will also be my mom's wake up call. Now all that is gone.

Anyway, if for anything, our estranged cousins in Baguio came to visit him. I felt awkward and good at the same time to see them. Last time I saw them was when I was just 5 years old. i didn't even know that the name of the youngest in teh family was Rianne. Shucks.

Well, I am in the office now since there are a lot of work to be done. I will go back to the wake later after I finish.

PS: It's just me lang pala who's calling my Baguio cousins estranged. Maybe i should say cousins in Baguio, period. hehe